An Open Letter To Grieving Mothers
Dear Grieving Mothers,
My heart weighs heavy with the ache we carry. I, too, am a mother who has been thrust into the unimaginable reality of outliving my child. I am writing to offer encouragement and hope. We must acknowledge the reality of our anguish, embrace our grief, and find solace in the knowledge that we are not alone on this life-sucking journey.
Your pain is valid—don't ever doubt that. It's real, it's
raw, and it matters. Don't let the world silence your grief with its empty
platitudes of "stay strong" or "find comfort in faith." Screw
that. It is okay to crumble. It is okay to unleash the guttural screams, to
drench your pillows in tears, and to rage against the cruel injustice of it
all. There is no timetable for healing, and no magical roadmap to navigate this
treacherous path. The bond between a mother and her child is eternal, and the
void left in their absence cannot ever be measured.
In this fickle world that often wants to hurry us through to
‘the other side’ of our pain (as if there is such a place😠) we must summon the courage
to embrace our grief without shame or judgment. Every tear that falls is a
testament to the boundless love we hold within, an unbreakable connection that
transcends time and space. Our children are interwoven into the very fabric of
our souls, and their absence leaves an emptiness that words alone cannot ever
hope to convey.
Grieving Mothers, we remember that grieving is an act of fierce love. Grief is not a linear journey, and there is no right or wrong way to navigate it. It is messy, it is unpredictable, and it is uniquely ours. It is not a burden to be hidden away. Instead, it bears witness to the love we hold and the depth of our humanity. It is an affirmation of the profound impact our children had on our lives and the undeniable void their departure has left behind. Give yourself permission to honor their memory, to speak their names with reverence, and to find whatever ways to keep their spirit alive within you.
Amidst the suffocating bleakness, I implore you to search for the flickering lights of hope and support. Find your circle. Surround yourself with those who understand, who don't shy away from your pain but instead hold you tenderly as you navigate the raging seas of sorrow. Hold yourself tenderly. Lean on the shoulders of those who can listen without judgment, who offer a safe harbor for you to pour out your deepest fears, your treasured memories, and your shattered dreams. Reach for your vulnerability and find healing within the compassionate embrace of eyes that truly see you. Conversely, do not be pressured to include everyone in that circle. Do not be afraid to release yourself from the company of those who respond callously to your pain. It is your heart, and you have every right to protect it.
Mothers, though we each carry our unique stories, we share a
bond that transcends our differences. Keep loving your child fiercely. I know
that I am! How could I not? And may the memories of the fruit of our wombs
forever dance, or sing, or whatever, in our hearts; their love guiding us
through the bleakest moments and reminding us that we are mothers—forever
connected to the gift of our offspring, even beyond this earthly realm.
With my love, understanding, and tear-stained embrace,
Andrea
#grief #children #death #grievingmothers #parentingafterloss #empathy #navigatingsorrow #llmb
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